Even though you haven’t stepped on the field yet as teammates, I’m sure you two have been chatting on yahoo and retweeting all of your ideas for dances and shit like that.  But let me be the first to say, “Don’t even fucking try it!”.  You have no hope of beating this dance.  Just try to get through the next few months of football, then you can get back to your careers as talk show hosts and dancing shows.  Hell, maybe next year you two can dance together.  I have to be honest, when I heard Ocho say today that Terrell was their #1 receiver, the first thing that went through my mind was he’s already T.O.’s bitch.

I’ve watched this video 50 times this morning!  GEORGE TEAGUE you are in the Mother Fuckin’ Fatguysports.com Hall of Fame for not allowing that shit to go on in YOUR HOUSE!  You want to know why Dallas has been coined “America’s Team”?  Watch this video over and over and over and over and over!  And just when you think you understand, watch it again!   Dude that shit is about Pride, Honor, Courage, Respect.    I’m not a fan of Dallas, but show me 1 video of Bengals Defense doing that or anything similar to it.  Even after Teague blasted Owens, Owens didn’t even go after him, he just went and stood on the star again.  But Teague, he dodges a fatass lineman, then goes after his ass.  I’ll take a team full of  guys like George Teague every day of the week before I’d take guys like Ocho and Terrell-O.

You gotta be ready for football after seeing that!

PS – Wasn’t it nice to see Emmitt Smith Running the ball again?

FOXSPORTS – Silvia Mena, 25, who is nearly four months pregnant, claimed the Washington Redskins player met her in Miami late last year and romanced her during Super Bowl week.

In papers to be filed in a New York court, she said that after Haynesworth, 28, found out about the pregnancy in late February, he promised to “emotionally and financially support” her.

But “after making such promises … Haynesworth has abandoned the pregnant Silvia Mena … He has refused to provide any emotional or financial support of Silvia Mena or his unborn child.”

The documents claim that Haynesworth — who signed a $100 million contract with the Redskins last year — refused to talk to Mena from late March.

Hmmmm…He “Romanced her during Super Bowl week”?  If by “Romancing” they mean going into the strip club, dropping a couple grand on a few lapdances, and informing her that he was the $100 million man…..then I agree, he romanced her.  What the fuck ever!  He saw a hot chick and she saw dollar signs.  End of Story!  Now there’s a baby on the way.  If he was just some schmoe, he never would’ve got in her panties in the first place.  And if he did, she never would’ve dreamed of going full term with the pregnancy.  But Albert is an easy meal ticket for the rest of her life.  Maybe next time Fat Albert will spend the $5 for some jimmy hats

If you don’t what a “Jimmy Hat” is, prepare to be enlightened by Mr. Ice Cube

Some of my favorite NFL games to watch are snowy, rainy, muddy, really cold weather, and all of the other natural elements.  The Hollywood show that has been the Superbowl for the last ump-teen years has been all about the week leading up to the superbowl, advertising dollars, and trying to create the perfect environment.  I’m glad that someone finally had the balls (or money) to stand up and say the game should be played in the natural environment.  Fuck all this perfect weather bullshit.  Some of the greatest games ever played were in 2′ of snow, can’t see the field, so fucking cold that bones crack and guys didn’t even know it.  I love this move by the NFL.  I would even take it a step further and say that instead of designating a stadium 5 yrs in advance, that you just let the team with the best regular season record be the home team for the superbowl.  Afterall, the 12th man is an important part of the game.  How about having a little hometown action going on?  If you want more info, you can read it HERE on ESPN!

PS – I realize the picture has nothing to do with the story.  But when I think of my “happy place” in “perfect weather”…that’s what I think of!
PSS – If you don’t like it, get your own blog and post whatever pics you want bitches!

Recap, early in the 2009 season Oregon got whooped by Boice State.  Being the good sport that Blount is, he decided he was going “Sucker Punch” an unhelmeted Boise State player that was talking trash during the game.  What a bitch move!  Everybody talks trash in a football game.  Hell, if you read the CINCYSOFTBALL.COM FORUMS, you can read all the trash talking about the trash talking that went on in a beer drinking league.  Trash talking and sports go hand in hand.  But when the game is over, it’s over.  But not for Blount!  And now this bitch is in the NFL doing the same shit.  Initially signing with the 49ers, then realizing he would have to compete for playing time, then decided to run off to the Titans where there is no competion.  Can’t wait to see him cry like a baby when he hears the shit talking in the NFL.  All I know, is when Ray Lewis starts talking about how he was banging Blounts momma the night before the game, blount won’t say shit!  Have fun in Tennessee.

PS – I think he ran from the 49ers because if he pulled some of that bullshit he pulled at Oregon, Singletary would’ve knocked his punk ass out!

I really believe that!…Its similar to Peter (blowhard) King and his butt-love for everything Brent (I know!) Favre! Its a man-crush on the highest level…..but, how funny was it to watch Clausen go mid-2nd while the guy Kiper\McShay proclaimed as UN-draftable just several weeks ago, went in the FIRST?…yeah, too funny indeed. I hope that manila envelope full of 100′s that some Irish alum gave Kiper were worth him looking that stupid (ok, yes, I’d have taken the money too!)….McShay the double-douche too!

These two yo-yo’s are really very funny, how they so ademantly define the draft as if they have a stake in ANY player taken! Or that either of them will ever be held accountable for being wrong. OK,…so MAYBE the rumor that SOP (Son-of-Paul) uses them as his scouting department is true, aside!

Noting the throngs of failed draft picks both these guys swore on, its hard to imagine ESPN still has a tolerance for supporting a “Draft-Guru” in any capacity!

A few months ago, TODD McShay had Washington Huskies QB Jake Locker as the BEST QB in the country! He also broke down Jimmy Clausen as a hack – primarily because he’s 6’2″ and “only” 216lbs???; NOT!,..not that he’s an under .500 QB in College with exactly Zero impressive wins to his credit, despite playing for a top recruiting team ever year he was there!” NO!..its definitely because he’s 6’2″ DUMBASS! Yeah, HE’S the “expert”. Then he got into THIS great argument with “Mel Kiper Jr”,..and soon after he shUFfles his love to Sam Bradford. Then during the actual Draft, he couldn’t blow Jimmy Clausen hard enUFf!?? Oh, but he’s DEAD on with his Tim Tebow eval’s, right?…oh, sure!

NFL scouts/insiders have these things to say about McShay-Shay! (highlighted by these shown direct quotes) Click the link for the whole rant!  McShay does not have any good connections,” the source opined.  “Higher-ups in the league think he is an arrogant asshole.   &   In our view, McShay does present well on television, where the requirement isn’t to know what you’re talking about but to seem like you know what you’re talking about. 

Of course the only thing this douchebag is steady on?…His hate for all things Tebow!…“He can’t play quarterback in the NFL, I’m convinced of it,’’ ESPN director of college scouting Todd McShay said. “From his delivery to his footwork to his accuracy, you have to absolutely strip him down and build him back up. And it’s too late.’’…He would go on to say how Tebow would be lucky to even GET drafted, much less “early”!!…What a Putz,….then he and Kiper(another Tebow hater) had to sit there and watch as THREE teams (Denver, Minnesots and bUFfalo) vied to get him! All the while Jimmy hUFfed and pUFfed his way down the pecking order. Oh, and I should add that NEITHER (Kipe or McShay) has EVER been in charge of developing an NFL QB in their LIVES! They’re lucky they can SPELL “QB”! While the credentials for the guy who HAS, Josh McDaniels of Denver, gets bashed by both!?! Let’s see,…Kiper and McShay have NEVER Coached at ANY level, and McDaniels has done THIS!?….

HHmmm?, yeah, I think I’ll let the guy who HAS walked the walk tell me who could or couldn’t be a QB before those two D-Bags. Then they, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle DUMB, spend the rest of this weekend telling the Football World why this CAN’T work! Not even leaving open a slight chance that the guy who owns two Title rings, a Heisman, and NCAA records a plenty, can succeed. No!.NONE! Tebow PLAYED against Bradford (and WON!) and he garnered more Titles and hardware than any other QB that played College Ball. YET!, he’s given no chance by two guys who “CALL” themselves “Experts”!?? OK, so playing well in College doesn’t grant you a perfect NFL career,…but NO CHANCE?…What kind of experts ARE they??? I think even if I were a NON fan of Tim Tebow’s, I’d be looking forward to seeing them look bad here!! I understand, though, if YOU personally don’t!

OK,..so to each their own, and to each their opinions,…right, I get that. Still, when you refuse to allow even the small notion that the guy who’s JOB it is to develop a QB totally washout in comparison to your own relatively UNEDUCATED opinion?; then you should probably find a new network to work for….maybe Boomerang, for these two? Will Tebow win a Super Bowl in the NFL?….maybe?…maybe not, and I understand his chances of being called a resounding success will be VERY LONG!…..Look at our own Carson Palmer! Is HE a bust?…many could say yes!….If he ALSO had a less than idea throwing motion, he probably would be already!, and that would be a mistake,…..too!

SO?….So let’s (her) DANCE

Get used to being on the ground, because that’s what happens when you’re the QB in Washington.  Good thing you don’t have to move very far, you can take your momma and her “Chunky Soup” with you.  Because you’re gonna need lots of huggs from mommy and when you get your grill busted open, you won’t be able to eat solid foods anyway.   I hate seeing the great players hang on for too long and end up fading away on a bad team.  This is worse than watching Jerry Rice to go Oakland.  I hated JR anyway, he was with the 49ers both times they beat the Bengals in the Superbowl, so he can kiss my ass anyway.  Good luck with the Redskins and be sure to stay in touch with your over the hill buddy Brian Westbrook, because he’s going to Cleveland.  A choice worse than yours, but not by much.  We look forward to watching you getting repeatedly thrown to the ground like a crackhead that refuses to pay  the neighborhood pharmacist!

“GO BEN GO!”

Antonio “dont drug test me” Bryant, formerly of the Cowboys, Browns, 49ers and Tampa Bay! (Oh, and he sat out a year whilst “suspended/dismissed”,..that’s a good thing, right???) Will bring his talents and baggage to CINCINNATI!….Having been one who wanted Lav Coles to work out here, this normally wouldn’t be much cause for celebration,…BUT!, considering the alternative!?…Well, its like “Ocho-Cinco de March Madness” all over this town! Terrell Owens isn’t coming in now!!! Yip-freakin-EEE….AND!, stupid ASS Chud Johnson can explain to his new team-mate how they are gonna be life-long buddies now, after having “twit”-endorsed TO like he was a sex starved School boy! Should make for a cozy relationship, huh?!

Bryant comes in with some problems in tow,….then again, this being Bungle country that’s kind of  a requirement here! He also seems to be of the now WAY too popular “I’m-overly-entitled-because-I-play-Football-and-I-am-a-wideReceiver” crowd, that our own Chud Johnson (and TO) is a chapter President of;…aaannnddd,I can’t imagine Bryant being worth 7million a year, considering he’s only “played” at the “high” level one year;…– but, that’s more an NFL economics question than anything else, I guess. He’s been a smaller scale TO, so, I guess we got the lesser (and younger) of two similar evils. STILL!…whew!…its NOT T.O.!   Fantastic!!! Up next, dump the Chump(Chud). Hey, I can hope, right?

WELCOME TO TOWN, Mr Bryant!

Soon, there will be a NEW Jackass in town! Hated in towns across America!;…From San Fran, to Baltimore, to Philly, to Dallas, and even bUFfalo!….He’snow headed here, and you can thank Cincy team mouthpiece, Chud Ocho-Side-Show-act-o for his interest. Yeah, many of the same fans who find value in Chud, a jerk who cost his team in both playoff loses (out of 2 …and both were at home, btw….meaning, this team was suppose to win those games) will LOVE following hims as he endorses an even  bigger distraction to our town! The same guy who killed his team by just being “himself” in both our playoff games (in the last 20+ seasons), wants to further ruin the team by bringing in his equally distracting idol….and, maybe his lover, too?…TO! (totally owesome!)

Quick review: Chud Johnson acted like a little freakin’ jackass in the locker room during half-time of the 2005 season play-off game against Pittsburgh. In a game where the Bungles lost Carson Palmer and needed a guy to mature and step up, they got Chad Johnson the f’in baby-ass instead! They still led at halftime; but! Chud, knowing there were camera’s rolling out on the field, was upset about NOT getting enUFf balls thrown his way. After all, he needed to exploit his face and camera’s generally followed the ball, not guys who’s nads fold up inside their bodies during big games! SO!, because he’s so juvenile and assy (its a word!) he reportedly got in such a “tizzy” that he took a bitch slap at a Coach. I can only imagine it was a “bitch slap” because Chud seems like he’s a sissy-bitch. After all, I’ve seen him try to block, and anytime he’s been hit, he’s gone DOWN  (Gawd I love that vid!) like a sack of dirt!. Chud did start to block a little in 2009, but at 14-million a year that’s a little late for him to get props. Then there’s that dive he took late in the game up in bUFfalo a few years ago, when he was just too scared after getting grazed?(The video showed he was almost completely missed!) That was about pathetic. Still, I understand many of the fans in town still bend over for his ass, so, he’s a least got y’all fooled. Of course, most of you probably chase the red (laser) light up and down the wall too. After all, side-shows like Chaud are here to divert attention. His side-shows acts, which have failed to help “his” team win even ONE playoff game (or even ONE must win game, for that matter), stay…but, he wont even once try the STFU and play method JUST once to see if that MIGHT be MORE helpful to an actual TEAM minded goal (WINS!)?… than his Bullshit skits have? (and they’ve failed miserably at all “TEAM” goals)…. Well, I sure hope winning is still a goal here….despite continual evidence to the contrary.

Anyway!…If the SECOND playoff game the Bengals “hosted” (and have BEEN in since 1990!) Mr “Productive”-o decided that after he was shut-down by D Revis in the Season’s FINAL game of the year (the week before), that he’d buckle down and concentrate ONLY on Football to prepare himself like a professional might, in an effort to help his team win this pending playoff game!….YEAH RIGHT!!…HA!..Man, that’s a freakin’ laugh!..No, instead, in typical jackass form he promoted himself (yawn, again!) by expressing that he’d “own” Revis in the rematch. He went on that week to continue to busy himself with other-than-football-related issues, such as; Express that the “man-on-man sex” he had during the week was proof he was “ready” to play, and then further ready himself by arranging to have the big rig truck he bought himself for his birthday; delivered and set up on display at the stadium. You know, all the important things ALL those wr’s from Indy and N’awlins do/did before their games. Yeah, RIGHT!(again)…Chud also busied himself by proposing that he’d change his name back to “Johnson”, if Revis wasn’t his “bitch” by game’s end. Well, add bet welcher to Chud’s long list of asinine characteristics. The D!ck-head still goes by that ridiculous Ocho-crap-o name! and still, the drones of fans stand by him (while he laughs at them).

Chud’s list of accomplishments continue with his bashing of the City, the fans, and all the players who expected him to actually lead the team by “playing” well (novel concept, eh?)….AND, as a team leader (defined by his time here, his salary and his self-promotion) he was critical of the expectations of him???? After all, they only get to play Cleveland TWICE a year!…OH, and he had that really good game against Miami that year they only won one game;….in week 17 no less!

THIS is the guy endorsing another guy who is as BIG an asshole, but has advancement down the diminished capacity career line a slight bit more! The Bills let him walk, and its been reported that NO OTHER TEAM HAS ANY INTEREST IN TERRELL OWENS at all. CHUD has taken all he’s meant to the city, and all that TO brings to the table, and the fact NO ONE else wants him, and decided assholes love company, and pioneered the Bungles signing the senior distraction/cancer! In true BT Barnum fashion, Mikey Brown has listened, and will probably sign this Class “A”9as in asshole) distraction and team destroyer. They made strides last year, but were a deep threat short of a good offense. Signing a guy NO other team wants, JUST MAKES GOOD SENSE! After all, we still have Chud!…and if HE were anything close to as good as he (and some of YOU) think?..He’s have moved on LOOOOONNNGGG ago! He knew no other team wanted him, and that no other fan base would put up with his diversionary clown antics. Other teams and other teams’ fans expect winning football over clowns!…or, at least a careful mix of both!

I feel really really bad for The Saints,….all they got was a Super Bowl win,….WE still have Chud and his tired ass act!…SUCKERS!!!…AND!, as a bonus, WE still use that tired old chant we stole from them YEARS ago!; ”Who Dey!?”…”WHO DEY?” (HA HA in their FACES!!!)….Well, since 1990?, “Who Dey” = everyone!! Can you imagine a more ridiculous chant for a this team? The only team to have zero playoff wins since 1990?!?!?

IF there is a saving grace here, its this;…..THERE does exist ONE guy in the NFL who is a BIGGER (and better) self-promoting media whore, than Chud (though to THIS guys credit, he has achieved a ga-zillion times more than Chud in his career); and that’s, you guessed it, Brent (I know) FaVre! The whore is going to prolong his “retirement/staying” presser for a few months yet, so I guess the idea that he and TO hook up for a last hoo-haa, is a possibility!??? The NFL has LONG lost its “sport” focused approach, and has been slowly sliding into the being what “pro” Wrestling is; Side-bar stories and distracting loud-mouthed idiots are now the driving force!….Sadly, its been eaten up by the fans so well, its now all the foundation the NFL has left, and what they now need to pursue to continue. This is no longer “Football”, but just another long-breathed staged Reality Show. Drink it in!….ITs gonna be grape flavored THIS year!