Hard Times at the pump!
Posted by TCombs in 
SAGINAW, Mich. — A man police caught performing a sex act with a car wash vacuum has been sentenced to 90 days in prison. Jason Leroy Savage must also submit to drug testing. The 29-year-old from Michigan, was sentenced Wednesday at Saginaw County Circuit Court. Savage pleaded no contest to indecent exposure last month.Savage’s attorney, Philip Sturtz, didn’t immediately return a message seeking comment. Police say Savage was arrested after a resident called officers early on Oct. 16 to report suspicious activity at a car wash in Thomas Township, about 90 miles northwest of Detroit.
90 days for pumping a vacuum??? That’s ridick-ulous! Who’s freakin’ running Michigan these days, the Taliban? Damn, my boy was just trying to get his freak on. I say the “resident” that called officers because of “suspicious activity” should’ve been minding their own fuckin’ business, or stop and give him a “hand” (pun intended). And really?, when they called the cops did they say, “Yes, this is Ted -in everybodies business- Johnson, and there is some suspicious activity going on down at Michaels Handjob Car Wash.” Or did he say, “I think there’s a dude fucking the vacuum”. Suspicious is walking around with your hands in your pockets in a jewelry store. This cat, Jason, had his cock in a vacuum. Pretty freakin’ obvious something wasn’t right there. Anyway, Thank god we live in the blessed state of Ohio. Where there politicians bang hookers, and at every local bar there’s a chick on a stool dying to be a vacuum for anyone that will talk to them.